I'm Still Alive
Yes, I'm still alive. Sorry for the disappearing act!
The move... well, it happened. It was a lot of work, and very exhausting for both of us. Samantha's Mom came out for a few days right before the move to help us with packing, and that was a Godsend, let me tell you. We had a big yardsale and got rid of lots of stuff, also Goodwill and other charities took a lot of stuff off my hands. It was really painful for a packrat like me to get rid of all that stuff.
The move itself -- a 24' truck towing a car trailer... from Arizona to Oregon in the middle of January. It was relatively uneventful but very tiring. Once we got here, things went pretty swimmingly. We got in on Thursday 1/19 evening, and by 2 p.m. the next day we had rented ourselves a nice 3-bedroom condo with a very nice landlady and a great price. Over the weekend we actually got moved in, with mucho help from Samantha's friends.
Monday 1/23 I started my new job at UberCorporation. It's a huge, huge company, 1000 times bigger than my last company. I'd not worked for a big company in a long time, but I am finally now (almost 2 months later) feeling reasonably well adapted.
As for Samantha and I... hm. It's been really all over the place. Feb. 20th we had a ragingly nasty fight, so much so that she went to her friend's house and spent the night there. That was probably the worst. After that we had a long talk about ourselves, how we relate, and how we interact. From that we came up with some ideas that are really helping, at least insofar as while we still fight, our fights are not so nasty as they were and a bit more respectful.
There are a lot of bumps though. Sometime in February I got Samantha to admit what she had long denied, and I had long suspected, that she had slept with her ex-fiance in November when she was in Vegas. I forgave her for that (it was a pretty confusing time for us) but it still really jolted me -- not so much the act as the fact that she lied about it, to my face. Trust is a major issue between us right now.
The other major issue is that I feel very ignored. She spends a lot of time with her friends here, C, C's husband R, and Samantha's goddaughter M. C and R and (especially) M are very nice, but we don't have a lot in common. They are Samantha's age, not well educated, not into art/books/music as I am. They aren't dumb (not in the slightest), but their interests are more in the D&D/roleplaying/gaming area. That stuff just isn't me. Since we've been here Samantha has spent a lot of time with them and I've been left alone in a city where I don't know anyone except some cousins and an aunt who live about 25 miles away.
The move... well, it happened. It was a lot of work, and very exhausting for both of us. Samantha's Mom came out for a few days right before the move to help us with packing, and that was a Godsend, let me tell you. We had a big yardsale and got rid of lots of stuff, also Goodwill and other charities took a lot of stuff off my hands. It was really painful for a packrat like me to get rid of all that stuff.
The move itself -- a 24' truck towing a car trailer... from Arizona to Oregon in the middle of January. It was relatively uneventful but very tiring. Once we got here, things went pretty swimmingly. We got in on Thursday 1/19 evening, and by 2 p.m. the next day we had rented ourselves a nice 3-bedroom condo with a very nice landlady and a great price. Over the weekend we actually got moved in, with mucho help from Samantha's friends.
Monday 1/23 I started my new job at UberCorporation. It's a huge, huge company, 1000 times bigger than my last company. I'd not worked for a big company in a long time, but I am finally now (almost 2 months later) feeling reasonably well adapted.
As for Samantha and I... hm. It's been really all over the place. Feb. 20th we had a ragingly nasty fight, so much so that she went to her friend's house and spent the night there. That was probably the worst. After that we had a long talk about ourselves, how we relate, and how we interact. From that we came up with some ideas that are really helping, at least insofar as while we still fight, our fights are not so nasty as they were and a bit more respectful.
There are a lot of bumps though. Sometime in February I got Samantha to admit what she had long denied, and I had long suspected, that she had slept with her ex-fiance in November when she was in Vegas. I forgave her for that (it was a pretty confusing time for us) but it still really jolted me -- not so much the act as the fact that she lied about it, to my face. Trust is a major issue between us right now.
The other major issue is that I feel very ignored. She spends a lot of time with her friends here, C, C's husband R, and Samantha's goddaughter M. C and R and (especially) M are very nice, but we don't have a lot in common. They are Samantha's age, not well educated, not into art/books/music as I am. They aren't dumb (not in the slightest), but their interests are more in the D&D/roleplaying/gaming area. That stuff just isn't me. Since we've been here Samantha has spent a lot of time with them and I've been left alone in a city where I don't know anyone except some cousins and an aunt who live about 25 miles away.
5 Comments:
http://www.okcupid.com/profile?tuid=14230283905363584208
Don't be so much of a "Don't Care Guy" that you are willing to compromise your morals and ideals. Samantha has a recent dating profile that shows that she is looking for long and short term relationships, and she has even listed herself as "bi." Is this what you are looking for in a wife and mother of your future children? Don't let your fear of lonliness make you settle for something that could drag your whole life down.
seriously dcg. this is going too far. you moved to a city that you didn't want to be in and now not only does she not hang out with you much she has a dating profile up in which she was active a month ago? not good. is she just using you to pay the bills? You're way way way too good for her.
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